Still going but is it working?

Today and yesterday I managed to drag myself through my exercise, it was hard and it was horrible. I felt weak and tired, the day before's exercise was fresh in my mind. And what's worse, I am so far away from figuring out my eating.

Usually, when I exercise alot I can eat alot and do not need to worry. But since I started this regime, I have been eating a lot and I do need to worry. I feel constantly bloated, like my food is not being digested. It is a horrible feeling. It is horrible looking, this protruding belly. I know that it is because I have been binging but some days I haven't even binged and it hasn't come right ;(

I love food so much and one of the things that I like about exercise is that it enables me to not worry about food, whether those fears are grounded or not. But it looks like I have lost that benefit and that is very sad and scary. I do not know how to deal with this now, binge eating has been part of my life for so long. I have only ever been able to manage it, I have never conquered the feelings that lead to it. ;( I hope I find a way. Addiction sucks. And this addiction is to a life force I need every day.